Hold the Line

Evan Gillick
Undergraduate/Spanish

The following is the story of how UWEC’s study abroad program changed my life, and how I came to know the true meaning of love. I hope my experience opens both your eyes, and your heart, and that you, too, will one day find the happiness I have---and no, this is not an article about being in love with Jesus, that article is written by Jerry.

I can’t remember the exact date, maybe January 9, 2009. Regardless, it was early January, and I had just deplaned in Madrid, Spain, an eager but ignorant student of high capability but little experience and a narrow view of the world. I was excited to study abroad! I had always considered my Spanish skills among the best of my peers, and was eager to be placed into an environment where they would truly be tested. Little did I realize at the time, my Spanish was not the only thing that would be tested during my stay in Spain.

All of the students at the University of Valladolid’s foreign language center were being encouraged to make friends with the locals, as they would be an invaluable source of not only fun, but of language practice and learning the city. Soon an opportunity presented itself. The University was hosting an event in which native English speakers could practice their Spanish with native Spanish speakers, and vice versa. I made the 45 minute long walk to the University knowing that at the very least, I would get more exercise by attending.

The event was run a lot like speed dating; a circle of tables was set up, with Spaniards on the inside and Estadounidenses on the outside. About every 5 minutes we would rotate to talk with a new person. After the event had concluded, a stunning goddess suddenly entered the room. I deliberately made my way to where she was mingling and eased myself into the conversation. As it would so happen, we had a lot in common! She wasn’t a drinker. She was very smart, artsy---basically the total package, for me. Her name is Luisa Garrote.

We began to hang out, go to movies, drink orange juice or Nestea at the bars, take long walks. We talked on MSN for hours a day. The more we talked the more special she became in my eyes. I had never met someone so incredibly nice and pure. One day we went out to dinner with my friends Mark and Paul. She was so cute in her dress! After eating we hugged in the Plaza Mayor and said our goodbyes. Something strange happened. I found my arms completely disobeying my brain’s command to let go of her before the hug became awkward. That night I realized I loved her, which was very strange to me because I never would have imagined myself falling in love with a woman 19 years older than me. But now, in hindsight, I can’t imagine myself ever having fallen in love with anyone else.

It was a time of great change for me. I came to Spain as a conservative Christian, and I left Spain as a liberal atheist. I had my doubts about religion for years, but one very powerful thing that moved me to reexamine my faith was not really so much a matter of specific Christian theology as it was that I had for my whole life ignorantly believed that God made somebody special to be with every person; a soul mate. I came to the realization that if the most incredible human being I had ever met was 38 years old and had never been married, and never found the right person, there are probably people who spend their whole lives and die lonely and unloved. This realization—that people die unloved—made me cry harder than I ever had in my entire life. It was as impactful to me, if not more so, than the realization that God is a myth. It would so happen that Luisa was an atheist, too! It was as if the Flying Spaghetti Monster had brought us together with his noodly appendages.

When I first expressed my feelings for Luisa, she was upset. She thought I should be with someone my own age, but was at the same time suppressing feelings she had for me. I stood by my feelings and pursued a relationship with her, not caring about the obstacles society seeks to impose upon us. I remember sending her that Toto song, “Hold the Line.” Love isn’t always on time, I told her. And sometimes it never comes.

It may not be a traditional relationship, but fuck tradition. Luisa and I have, and will continue to beat the odds. We carried on a faithful long distance relationship for 19 months before I was finally able to visit her again. On January 13th 2011, in the Plaza Mayor of Valladolid, Spain, I got down on one knee and asked her to marry me. I knelt in the very spot we had hugged the day I realized I loved her, and by coincidence she was wearing the same dress. I had taken her on a walk throughout the city recounting every single memory of her and every moment we shared as it pertained to the location through which we passed. I’ll never forget any of it; her smile, her walk, her voice, her touch. There is simply too much to our relationship and to this incredible woman to do any of it justice within the confines of a short article. In September I will be moving to Spain so that we can spend our lives together. I CAN’T WAIT!!!!

All I really want to say with this article is this: don’t let love pass you by just because it takes a form you did not anticipate. Love is a beautiful thing, and if you find it, you’re damn lucky to have it. Love is not about finding a perfect person; it’s about learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. Although, let’s be honest here…Luisa is pretty much perfect!